Been A Long Time

Wow! It has been a long time since I have posted. Things have been going on. Some bad and some good.  There have been family ins and family outs. A lot of the time I have not got a single clue about what is going on. I have come to the absolute conclusion that the people I call 'family' are completely nuts. And I don't mean party nuts. I mean nucken futz. That kind, yea.

Unforgivably we are still living in a tiny little trailer in a tiny little town in the corner of Hell, Texas.

I long to leave everyday. I wake up every morning hating the fact that I wake up here.

Yes, since the last time I blogged a lot has happened.

I had to have a total of 4 surgeries to fix all that was wrong with me. In and out of the hospital for a long time. I am now 6 months post-op and I feel wonderful!

On March 22nd, 2012 I became a vegetarian. It is awesome! I have always wanted to do this but never really had any support from family or friends. So now I am doing it and it is going great! 

I have gone on to decide that I need to be healthier.

This is an excerpt from my Live Strong profile.

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I recently came aware of these facts.
I weight nearly 300 pounds.
I have a 2 year old and a 4 year old(boys).
I have diabetes.
I have high blood pressure.
I have high cholesterol.

I got my wake up call last August (2011). I went to my doctor for a yearly check up. Turns out I needed a hysterectomy and my gall bladder removed. 
That was a trip!
Six months post op and I feel fabulous! 
Or I did until I realized that I cannot wear anything in my closet. None of my pants, skirts, shorts fit me anymore.
I do not want to have to buy new clothes again!
I have been a vegetarian for a little over a month now. I do still eat fish, so I guess that makes me a Pescetarian.

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 Last October (2011) Jason and I decided to do something different. He had been diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and was on a lot of different medications. His doctors were trying to get it all straightened out so that he could finally go back to work.
We came to the conclusion that we could do something pro active. Something to try to get some sort of income. Even if it only buys diapers.
So we started making earring and necklaces and bracelets and I started knitting things. And crocheting. Scarves, hats, bed room, house shoes, all sorts of things. We started selling things on a website called Etsy.
I discovered it on a morning of boredom. I was like hey, we can do this!
So now our little business is GROWING. Which is great. I only wish I could be there to see the looks on my customers faces when they open my product for the first time. That would make it better.
We have actually gotten to a point where we now have three different stores on many different venues. We even from time to time sell on Ebay.
You can follow our blog for this store at JM HomeCrafts Blog

JM Jewelry And Accessories is the brain child of Jason and I. We needed a different type of store for the accommodation of our ever growing line of jewelry. So we developed JM Jewelry And Accessories. It has been slow moving and we are slowly rolling our jewelry over to this new store.
The blog for this store can be located at JM Jewelry And Accessories Blog

Lost Time Steampunk is a venture that is mainly Jason's baby. And it has done very well. With 3 sales in its first week open and has settled down now, but we get inquiries nearly everyday about some we have in the store or something we can do for the store.
It has been doing good. I can only hope that it can keep growing. We are expanding this store. Currently we have jewelry and some creepy crawlies. But we have plans in the works for all sorts of new steampunk things. From steampunk cuffs to clothes, to home accessories. We have big plans for this store.
Please feel free to follow this blog at Lost Time Steampunk Blog

So as kind of a re cap. We are still here. For now. Where to next? 

Don't know yet. 

Jason now has to walk with a cane. He is considering going back to school. Phlibotomist (sp) or a EKG tech. Or something along those lines. I think that he will do very well. 

Our boys are ever growing and learning. I can't wait to see how they turn out and I hope that we don't fuck them up too badly. Michael will be starting school next year. I can't believe that he will be 4 in just 2 months.

O.O!!!!!! Where did time go?

They only people in my family I am now talking to is my mom. She is the only one who does not think that we are all going to hell. Or if she does, she is much less vocal about it.Thank goodness. My sister makes a enough noise about that by her self. But that would be an entirely different post.  My brother seems to have jumped on the 'I Hate Jessica' band wagon.  The really sad part? It all started over a picture on Facebook. \/ \/ \/ \/ \/

That picture on the right. I think it a beautiful picture. One of my friends shared it. I shared it to my husbands wall. You know how Facebook works. When two of your friends or even one shares a link/picture/status update you see it too. Well my brother saw this and he went berserk. He removed me and my husband and blocked us from seeing him and contacting him. What?!? Yes and now he and my sister have come together over me. My sister and her boy friend are convinced I am casting spells on them and making him have bad dreams. Well, she told my brother this and now he is saying the same thing. What is wrong with these people?

To make matters worse, my granny is recovering from and injury and is home on rest. My mom is there. She will be coming back here for a short while to be with my dad for a little while before she goes back. When she goes back she will be stopping in Beaumont to pick up my sister and her ass hat, um, I mean boy friend. That will be lovely. I can tell.

But for right now I am looking forward to my mom coming to see Michael and Jonathan for a little while. They love their Granny. :)

Jason does not talk to anyone in his family now. There had been a great deal of trouble between him and his mother for many years. Screaming matches, hang ups, and cussing has been going back and forth for a very long time. I have personally believed for a long time that my mother-in-law is toxic. She is a pretty good grandmother in the way that she buys her grands kids love. She was , however, a horrible mother. Wasn't it Bill Cosby who said that a grand parent is just an old person trying to get into heaven. Or something along those lines. She finally gave way a couple weeks ago and told us all that she thinks that everything Jason has ever done in his life is wrong, horrible, and evil. That even he is a waste. She regrets that he lives. That he is the cause of all of the wrong in her life. He has been told that since his father died when Jason was 5 that he is useless and was even the cause of the death. 

So we have cut her out of our lives and it feels like a great weight has been lifted (for me). He is feeling tortured and alone. She was the last person that he could call family. He has now been cut off and I can tell that he feels so alone. I wish that I could somehow erase all the pain she has caused him. I sit back and I can see him emotionally drowning. I am daily looking for that lifesaver that will fit, and pull him up. But luckily, he can get lost in his work occasionally. 

So hopefully next time I blog it will be a little less dramatic or there will be good news to report. And if we are really lucky, and cross our fingers, toes, eyes, and legs, walk on rainbows, and dig to China, we might be less dramatic and have good news. 

Next time!

So Many Things

A lot of things have been happening. Where do I even begin? Well, I had a total laproscopic assisted vaginal hysterectomy on September 20th. I also had my gallbladder removed at the same time. The surgery took a lot longer that it should have. Only supposed to be 3 hours, more like 5 hours. Yay!! Reason for that was when I had my C-section with Jonathan my uterus never shrank back and it attached itself to my abdominal wall and it remained enlarged. So my uterus was 3x the normal size. My parents moved back here on the 14th of September. Which was supposed to be a good thing, but I will save that for a separate post. I need to have a blood transfusion, I lost a lot of blood during surgery and I needed 2 units. I stayed in the hospital until the 24th and was finally able to go home. Very sore and very tired.
I was taking a nap and I started feeling warm water flowing over me in a dream like state. It sort iof woke me up a little and I realized it was not a dream and I was flowing blood from my vagina. That was not supposed to be happening. Until this point I had only a light pink barely there discharge. Called my on-call doctor right away. We were told to wait and come in to see my doctor in the morning. We did that and she said to come in and see here NOW. She did and exam and could not see where the blood was coming from. So she sent me back to the hospital for observations. Yippee! I only managed to stay 4 hours instead of the 24 hours my doctor wanted. Reason, we live 2 hours from the hospital, no money for more gas or any other ride there. So my blood count stayed good, it only went down one point. So she let me go home on the promise that I will be super careful. I promised.
10 days later I felt a rip after I sneezed. I did not think anything of it as I was still laying in bed. I got up to tinkle and a HUGE blood clot fell out of me. And they kept on coming out. I wold cough, sit , stand, yell, anything and they would just fall out. Called the doctor, she told me to head to the hospital. Went in the ER, they got me back into a room. Doc came in and she did an exam. Said I tore a great big hole in my stitched cuff. She said that she needed to go back in and sew me back up. So they sent me upstairs to a room and told me they would do the operation at about 7am. Fine with that. I went to sleep and Jason took Jonathan home. Nurses came and went all night. My OR nurse came and got me about 7:30am and wheeled me away. I was told this was going to be so easy, that it would be over in just 30 minutes. Sigh, awesome. More sleep. lol. Next thing I know, I wake up and it is 4:30pm and my husband is on his way to see me. Turns out, I had been torn completely open and my skin just kept tearing and tearing everywhere she would put the needle. Also, turns out I woke up two times and they had to put me back out. Thank goodness I don't remember that!!
The next evening I was even still bleeding. My doctor came in and check me out and she said I would have to be packed over night. O.O She put about 3 feet of of cheese cloth like gauze in my hooha! that was not actually too bad. As long s I did not sit straight up. She came in the next morning and removed it. The bleeding slowed and finally I was able to go home the next day. Doctor ordered bed rest. No getting up for anything. I could only get up to got potty. On the 24th of October I saw her for a check up. All looks good and I barely have a discharge. In 3 more weeks I go back to see about starting my 'wifely duties' back as she called it. lol :D I guess I will let you know how it goes from then.
I am doing good now. I had to get a better medicine for sleeping. 

TLAVH

Go in to see my doc today for my post-op. I had my hysterectomy on the 20th and my gallbladder removed at the same time. I have a TLAVH, was able to keep my ovaries. Due to a high white blood count, a low red blood count, fast heart beat, high blood pressure, and dizziness I was to stay in the hospital and receive 2 units of blood and other medications. I came home on the 23rd. At 1am on the 27th I started bleeding pretty good. 7 pads in 8 hours. My on-call told me to rest and come in to see my doctor in the morning. Went over to her office and she check me back into the hospital. I stayed under observation for about 5 hours. I begged to go home. Doctor finally released me on the condition that I stay in bed and get up only to pee. And I am not to lift anything heavier than a water bottle. Well, I go to see her at 1:30pm and the bleeding has not stopped. I has slowed a great deal. Only 2 pads a day now. Funny thing is, I was scheduled to start my last period the same day as my surgery. Now it looks as if surgery only delayed it by a week! lol :/