First day of physical therapy for Jason. Still no too sure how I feel about all of this. I think next time he can go and come by himself. Or maybe next time I will try the library. I don't know yet. Went to Wal Mart to pick up a few groceries while we waited on Daddy. That went well for the most part. I still have to use the little girls room. The one and only family bathroom in the store was out of order. Now I am during out side the therapy center waiting on Jason. They said it would only take about an hour. It has been an hour since he walked in. and only 45 minutes since his appointment time. Let's see how much longer we have to wait. I am so glad that the a/c works in the van. According to my phone it is 100°f here today. And asphalt parking lot and brick building, it is probably more like 108°f or so. Sounds fun. I hope he comes out soon. Wish me luck!
I am a single bisexual mother of 2 boys. Michael is the my oldest and Jonathan is the youngest. So I am tired all the time. I have been a practitioner of Wicca for a long time now, since I was around 14.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Growing up...
My mother recently kept my then three year old for three weeks in the months of May and June. I felt kind of like that was a much needed break. I missed my big man so much. But I was happy to have time with my husband and my little guy. There were some things that happened when Michael was at his Granny's house that I was not okay with. I did not say anything to her at the time. The main reason for that is because she did the same things when I was a kid. I was raised the same way and I turned out okay, right? I thought about it and I thought about it some more until I was down right mad about a few things. Sending me picture messages of my little man. Oh, so happy to get them! But, wait, he is wearing his pajamas. It is 5 pm. They just woke up!! All because they did not go to sleep until 6 am.
Now, my dad works 40-70 hours per week. He can get home anywhere from six to nine in the evening. He gets up and goes to work between four and five in the morning. My husband was horrified by this behavior by my mother. I was nonplussed by it. Like I said, I have known the same most of my life. He was also very easy to get back on a normal schedule. Not the point. To this day, as a 28 year old, mother of two,i have trouble sleeping when I should. Like right now it is six am. I have not slept yet. My kids have been in bed since around nine, ten o'clock. My point is, I struggle with sleeping like I should. I have to fight with myself to even go to bed. And once I get there, it is a whole different battle to go to sleep. I have been laying here thinking and piddling around for probably four hours now. Sleep does not always win for me.
I can remember times in high school that I was not allowed to go to bed because my mom wanted company until around four am. I would finally go to sleep, only to be woke up three hours later for school. Then off to work after school. Home again to do the same thing over and over. On grade school I remember staying up so late one night that I could hardly see for being so tired. And I was like six or seven at the time.
I don't want my kiddos to fall into that kind of pattern. The only way I can stop it is to sassy no, you cannot keep the boys until you straighten up. That would break my dads heart. He is normal in this respect. I don't think my mom can ever change.
Maybe send some sleep magic back with Michael next time. That might help. :)